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Jealousy and Conflict Within Relationships

Jealousy is an emotional response to a perceived or real threat to an important or valued relationship. In many cases it evolves from another person who could potentially interfere with one's own romantic relationship. Jealousy is commonly recognized in this situation and it is most often seen as a negative emotion. This jealousy can often lead to conflict within a relationship and may have many consequences for all parties involved. I know many people, including myself, who have found themselves in a situation such as this and have ridden the emotional rollercoaster that is often associated with jealousy in a romantic relationship.

I have experienced several trivial forms of jealousy that I was able to deal with and overcome. I am not a jealous person as in envying other people or what they have and I rarely thought that I had the ability to feel jealousy until I entered college three years ago. Upon entering college, I met the love of my life, made plans to get married, have children, and die with this guy, but a short two and a half years later, that relationship ended. Throughout the course of our relationship we experienced several passionate fights over jealousy. In addition to several other factors, looking back


Once I became his girlfriend our relationship became much more intimate. I was experiencing new emotions I had never felt for anyone including lust, desire, and love. Soon we both fell in love and began to experiment sexually which neither of us had any experience in that area. Because he was my first true love, I was very protective of him and would become extremely jealous when any girl would touch or speak to him flirtatiously. Although we would spend most of our time together, we still had not established a solid, trusting relationship. Without trust, a relationship begins to experience numerous trials and tribulations often created by jealousy.

Jealousy is a natural emotion that springs from passion within a relationship. There are three types of jealousy according to Gerrod Parrott (1991) as cited by Wright (1999). The first type of jealousy is the fait accompli jealousy that involves an ended relationship. The feelings of jealousy are due to the fact that the relationship is over and the other partner has moved on. The second type of jealousy is suspicious jealousy which occurs when an individual in the relationship becomes suspicious of any outsider of the opposite sex. The couple is now in a serious relationship and paranoia grows stronger due to the fear of rejection. The third type of jealousy is when one is not in a relationship but longs to be in one. This is characterized by the wanting and hoping for a relationship with a certain individual. Sadly, I fell into all three categories. I was jealous before the relationship began, during the relationship, and even after the relationship was over when I had discovered he had moved on and began dating someone else. The consequence of terminating the relationship is not always the only resolution to conflicts caused by jealousy.

There is usually conflict seen in a relationship due to jealousy, as seen in my example. According to Argyle (1987), conflict between lovers is common because the two are getting to know each other better and are sharing more of their lives together. The threat of another person disturbing this process causes extreme stress and eventually conflict. This conflict can have both desirable consequences and undesirable consequences. Jealousy ma

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Approximate Word count = 1524
Approximate Pages = 6 (250 words per page double spaced)


  

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