The Human Mating Game
It's a dance as old as the human race. At cocktail lounges and church socials, during office coffee breaks and dinner parties-- most blatantly, perhaps, in the personal ads in newspapers and magazines-- men and women participate in a ritual that has been embedded in our existence since the dawn of man. Beginning at young ages, humans start learning to master the art of attracting someone of the opposite sex, one day hoping to find the perfect mate. Whether it was the physical aspect, personality aspect, or the chemical aspect of attraction, there is something that attracts mankind to members of the other sex. The question is, "How do you interpret these signals and how do you respond to them?" Researchers and educators are beginning to observe that the age that children start to take notice of the opposite sex. As early as the pre-teen years children start "going out." Many parents fear that their kids are being pushed into adulthood too quickly. Yet, they recognize that pre-teen relationships often resemble child's play more than teenage romance. Pre-teens pair up to impress their friends. Within a group of pre-teens, they might constantly trade boyfriends and girlfriends because it doesn't really matter as
The early teenage years are when young adolescents begin to learn the basics of the 'Flirting Game,' especially the girls. There are 52 different nonverbal courtship behaviors used by women. 31 of these 52 flirtations were exhibited by 13-16 year old girls in a study that included going to shopping malls, ice skating rinks, and other places that adolescents congregate. The only signals missing were those at the more overt end of the spectrum, such as actual caressing. Not only were some of the signs missing, but the teens' gestures looked less natural than ones that would be made by more mature females; They laughed much louder, stared more obviously, and their moves were overall much sloppier. If there was a leader among the group, the followers usually modeled their behavior on the leader of the pack. The rate at which these adolescents signaled was considerably less frequent- 7.6 signs per hour per girl, as opposed to 44.6 per woman. Even though they much rougher around the edges than a mature woman, these girls were equally effective in attracting the object of their affection, in this particular case, teen boys (Lott 42-45, 72). Women traditionally look at a prospective mate's ambition, status, and resources. Females tend to look at more of the material things in relation to physical appearance. They find more appealing a man who can take care of a baby rather than a man who can take care of his hair (Allman 56-63) According to researchers, regardless of looks at younger ages, the personality of the person has a major significance on appearances in the future. Those who have good personalities when they are younger will be considered fairly attractive in their older years (Neimark 18). According to a poll taken worldwide, the top two mating preferences were not great looks, fame, youth, wealth, or status, but kindness and intelligence. They are love's greatest allies (Allman 56-63). This brings the point that it really doesn't matter how physically attractive one may think they are because there is most likely a person in the world who finds them attractive and would want a relationship with them. Their personality may win them a mate instead of gorgeous looks. Of course, most of these points brought up are only opinions and majority assumptions. I encourage one to draw their own opinion from their own experiences, because it will have more meaning and give them a better understanding of this dance we call the human mating game. Where do emotional and physical attraction meet? The obvious answer is in a relationship, but looking before that there is a ritual that most living beings take part in. This 'dance' that animals take part in is flirting. Most men think that they are the ones who initiate the flirting by making the "first move." In all actuality, the "first move" may have something as simple as brief eye contact initiated by the woman. Woman are usually the ones who initiate flirting by attracting towards them to make their move. As mentioned earlier there are 52 signs that a female has in her arsenal to draw the attention of that one man that she may be eyeing. The women who normally draw the most response in a social setting are the ones who send the most signals. Deemed universal among women: the eyebrow flash (an exaggerated raising of the eyebrows of both eyes, followed by a rapid lowering), the coy smile
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Approximate Word count = 2263
Approximate Pages = 9 (250 words per page double spaced)
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