Prior to November 2, 1987, a good part of America was laboring under the myth that domestic violence was something that happened to poor people. This assumption had much to do with the fact that poor people utilized community resources to deal with domestic violence, while the wealthy had the resources to keep domestic violence, and its solution, a dirty little secret. However, on November 2, 1987 that myth was exploded. Responding to a phone call that a child had stopped breathing, the police found a dying little girl, a boy tied to a playpen with a length of rope, and a severely battered mother. The little girl, Lisa Steinberg, was later pronounced brain dead and the world began to understand what went on behind the doors of the Steinberg/Nussbaum home. .

             One of questions that the A Family Secret: The Death of Lisa Steinberg attempts to answer is what is the cause of domestic violence? In order to do this, the video gives the audience a lot of information about Joel Steinberg, and focuses on the extensive use of drugs by both adults in the Steinberg/Nussbaum home. However, the use of drugs does little to explain either why Joel Steinberg abused his children or why Hedda Nussbaum permitted the abuse. The answer to those questions is more complex than mere drug use.

             To understand why Hedda Nussbaum did not intervene and protect her children, it is important to understand the culture of domestic violence in the 1970s and 1980s. At that time, it was a woman"s role to be the perfect partner to her chosen male companion. Unhappiness in a relationship was seen as the woman"s fault, and women were bombarded with advice from all types of media on how to get and keep their men happy. Furthermore, in domestic violence situations, the abuser constantly bombards the abused with the message that they have somehow brought the abuse upon themselves. Therefore, victims, like Hedda, permit the abuse because they believe they deserve to be abused.