On Being Black and White
I was late for school, and my father had to walk me in to class so that my teacher would know the reason for my tardiness. My dad opened the door to my classroom, and there was a hush of silence. Everyone's eyes were fixed on my father and me. He told the teacher why I was late, gave me a kiss goodbye and left for work. As I sat down at my seat, all of my so-called friends called me names and teased me. The students teased me not because I was late, but because my father was black. They were too young to understand. All of this time, they thought that I was white, because I had fare skin like them, therefore I had to be white. Growing up having a white mother and a black father was tough. To some people, being black and white is a contradiction in itself. People thought that I had to be one or the other, but not both. I thought that I was fine the way I was. But like myself, Shelby Steele was stuck in between two opposite forces of his double bind. He was black and middle class, both having significant roles in his life. "Race, he insisted, blurred class distinctions among blacks. If you were black, you were just black and that was that" (Steele 211).Since Altoona is a primarily white city, I grew up being around white
My first dealing with my double bind here at school happened on the very first day of class. Several people asked me what nationality I was. I answered with "mixed." I said, "my father is black and my mother is white." They looked at me as if I was speaking different language? They couldn't understand what I had just told them. Their first impression of me was that I was something else. "No I'm not Jamaican, and no I'm not Hispanic, I'm simply just half-black and half-white." Why couldn't they except the fact that I was biracial, African American and Caucasian? Why did I have to be a different nationality, like being biracial wasn't good enough for them? I love to answer that question when I am asked, however I was not expecting that type of reaction from them. It was hard for them to comprehend that a person could actually be both black and white, and that they did not have to choose between one or the other. My first friend I made here was black. She told me that I am who I am, and there is nothing I can do to change where I came from. God chose me to be a biracial child for a reason. And because of that, I am now a stronger person. I am no longer ashamed that I am both, black and white. When I came to the campus, I wasn't sure how people would react to me. I wasn't sure how I should "act". Would people look at me differently if they knew I was biracial? I mean I couldn't just decide to be white one day and black the next. Some people think it is like waking up and deciding what to wear, "Hmm, should I wear the red or blue shirt today?" "Hmm, should I be black or white today?" Steele expresses, "What becomes clear to me is that people like myself, my friend, and middle-class blacks generally are caught in a very specific double bind that keeps two equally powerful elements of our identity at odds with each other" (Steele 212) But as long as you, yourself, are ok with your double bind, it shouldn't matter what other people think. You can't help what you were bor
Some common words found in the essay are:
Shelby Steele, Ethnicity Power, American Caucasian, , Hispanic I'm, black white, double bind, white people, ashamed black white, black middle class, middle class, ashamed black, father black, black middle, steele 212, stronger person, black person,
Approximate Word count = 1348
Approximate Pages = 5 (250 words per page double spaced)
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