As a traffic engineer, I am obviously more qualified to be operating a moving vehicle than anyone else on the road. After all, I know the proper term for those little sparkly things that they glue to the pavement: bidirectional amber reflectorized pavement markers. Since I am such a qualified driver, I become extraordinarily irritated with the ignorance of other drivers. There are three primary sources of my aggravation: people who drive beside me, people who drive behind me, and people who drive in front of me.

First there are the idiots who drive beside me. They never know where they are going. Each time that I inadvertently miss my turn, some moron is in the left lane looking for street numbers and blocking me from making a U-turn. Such behavior is revolting. More importantly

Even more loathsome than the rocket scientists who drive beside me are the would-be jet pilots who drive behind me. If they think that riding my bumper is going to speed me up, they have a lot to learn. If I need to look for street numbers, they will simply have to be patient. And when I lock up my brakes and squeal across three lanes of traffic as I locate the number I'm looking for, they had better be paying attention. I am much too busy to worry about them. It's not my fault that they are in such a hurry. They should have left earlier.

, it is dangerous. It always seems that the same loathsome fool is in my way when, due to a minor distraction, I change lanes without looking. I would think that he would remember me and get out of my way. Doesn't he realize that I am an important person with important appointments to keep?

Those wh

Some common words found in the essay are:
Double Standard, drive beside, people drive, drive front,
Approximate Word count = 575
Approximate Pages = 2 (250 words per page double spaced)