Things not to say during sex

A detailed Summary of Things not to say during sex

*(in a janitor's closet) And they say romance is dead...

*A little rug burn ever hurt anyone!

*Sweetheart, did you lock the back door?

*But whipped cream makes me break out.

*Person 1: This is your first time..right? Person 2: Yeah.. today

*(in the No Tell Motel) Hurry up! This room rents by the Hour!

*Can you please pass me the remote control?

*On second thought, let's turn off the lights.

*And to think- I was really trying to pick up your friend!

*(using body paint) Try not to leave any stains, okay?

*Hope you're as good looking when I'm sober...

*(holding a banana) It's just a little trick I learned at the zoo!

*Do you get any premium movie channels?

*Try not to smear my make-up, will ya!

*(preparing to use peanut butter sexually) But I just steam-cleaned this couch!

*I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs!

*I think my dad is listening at the door.

*Oprah Winfrey had a show about men like you!

*I thought that goes in the other hole....

*Do you know what some female spiders do after sex?

*Did I mention my transsexual operation?

*Stop moaning, you sound so stupid.

*When is this supposed to feel good?

*Can you hold this sandwhich for me?

*I'm sobering up and you're getting ugly!

*You'll still vote for me, won't you?

Approximate Word count = 1649
Approximate Pages = 7 (250 words per page double spaced)

Category: Miscellaneous

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