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Children and the Single Parent Single parenting begins with the divorce of a couple who have children. Approximately ninety percent of all minor children live primarily with their mothers. Non custodial fathers usually have less than biweekly contact with their children, and involvement usually declines as time goes by. Since most single-parent households are mother-headed, and have only one income, often below that of a man. This results in economic distress and fewer opportunities for educational and extracurricular experiences. Economic constraints may limit growth enhancing experiences. Even children whose fathers pay substantial child support are faced with limiting experiences. Children hate divorce because having two of the most important people in your life living apart hurts. For children, divorce is not a one time event, but a continued process. This is a traumatic experience for the children because it leaves them feeling alone, as if nobody in the world cares about! them. Single parenting affects each child differently according to that child's age. Infants and young children can feel abandoned by the decision of parents to get divorced. Most infants and young children need to feel, hear, and see both parents in orde
Works Cited Ackerman PhD, Marc J.. "Does Wednesday mean Mom's house or Dad's?". New York: John Wiley & Sons, Inc., 1997. Dolmetsch, Paul and Alexa Shih. The Kids' Book About Single-Parent Families. New York: A Dolphin Book, 1985. Garrity, Carla B. and Mitchell A. Baris. Caught in the Middle. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1994. Goldstein LL.B., Sonja and Albert J. Solnit M.D.. Divorce and Your Child. New Haven: Yale University Press, 1984. Kalter, Neil. Growing Up With Divorce. New York: Ballantine, 1990. Troyer, Warner. Divorced Kids. New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1979. custodial parent must keep the non custodial parent informed of all the children's' activities. They must make sure all schoolwork is completed and not lost or forgotten. This too, involves scheduling and a type of "babysitting affect", when the non custodial parent decides what they need to do is different from what the custodial parent wants, this produces a negative effect. In "Does Wednesday mean Mom's house or Dad's?" by Marc J. Ackerman PhD, in his section on making visits better, he explains that children complain about visiting being boring. One parent becomes the "Disneyland Parent". This can become costly and neglectful of parenting activities. Desirable visits can be made by allowing children to invite friends or to become active in planning the visits (120). The last phase of child development is adolescence. All adolescence go through puberty. If parents separate during adolescence, children deal with the loss of stability, support, protection, and the family stru! cture. Some adolescents feel they have to grow up faster. In the eyes of the child, parents become selfish, stupid, weak, and cruel. Divorce brings a more lasting bitter and demeaning view of parents. Children blame themselves and begin to feel as if no one loves them. In The Kids' Book About Single-Parent Families by Paul Dolmetsch and Alexi Shih, they explain that children are used to getting blamed by their parents for doing things wrong. They come up with reasons why it's not their parents fault, but their own. Parents have to remember that to a kid, almost anything is possible (34). Adolescence are unpredictable. They are independent beings. Parents who earlier felt pushed out of their children's lives by an angry ex-spouse, find a second chance to heal old wounds and create a new relationship with their adolescent child. Over time, parental wars take a greater toll on
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Approximate Word count = 1644
Approximate Pages = 7 (250 words per page double spaced)
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