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never enough

She pinched it vigorously between her fingers and felt the slimy inner walls slide against each other. It repulsed her. Frantically grabbing at the other side she discovered that it was just as disgusting. The thought of the putrid fat on her body gave her a vomiting sensation. It had been just a little over 6 weeks since the plan had become a routine. The little pre-formal diet that she had discovered had turned into a daily battle of will power. The scales were getting worn out from their constant usage and yet the 'right' weight never appeared. She would stand on those scales watching with anxious anticipation as the numbers wobbled around the determining line. Everyday she witnessed the numbers decrease as grim felling of satisfaction would overcome her as she conquered another kilogram. 56, 51, 47, 45... To her there was no such thing as an ideal weight, there was always more that could be lost. The drive she had inside her amazed her and she knew to achieve results one mu!

Avoiding food had become so easy. In the initial wee


The full-length mirror in her bedroom was the one enemy she had trouble facing. For hours she would stand in front of it staring at her skeletal reflection. The image in the mirror reflected a tired unhealthy emaciated frame, but she still saw rolls of fat drooling over her body. Her breasts had turned into tiny empty sacks that hung limply from her chest. The skin across her stomach was stretched tightly over her protruding hipbones. Knees, elbows and collar bone stuck out from under her skin, every rib in the cage could be seen but it still wasn't enough.

Dinner was the only meal that anyone would be there to see her consumption of food, or lack there of. She would pick restlessly at her food, rearranging the contents on the plate whilst keeping the family occupied with endless chatter. When no one was watching she would leave the tale and scrape her plate into the bin.

Guilt played an overwhelming part in this act of deprivation. Any time a morsel of food escaped her guard and entered her body, she was consumer with guilt. . She came to know the reflection in the toilet

Some common words found in the essay are:
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Approximate Word count = 729
Approximate Pages = 3 (250 words per page double spaced)


  

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