Shared Time
Shared time is a concept that can be subject to personal interpretation. Everyone has his or her own idea of what shared time is, how much of it is needed and even when it may or may not be needed. In examining my relationship with my boyfriend I have recently come to a startling conclusion. We both have conflicting ideas of what is and is not shared time. My needs include enough time to know my boyfriend is there, but not so much that I feel crowded. My boyfriend's interpretation of shared time implies, "whenever possible." The tension comes when one of us thinks that he or she is either not getting enough or getting too much. This tension creates a misunderstanding and the problem lies in needs not being met to each person's satisfaction. The Symbolic Interaction Theory provides great insight into this situation."Symbolic Interaction Theory, (SI) discovered by George Herbert Mead and published by Herbert Blumer, centers on the relationship between symbols and interactions." (West, Turner) The goal of SI is to describe how shared meaning is created. The theory explains that we all have our own sense of what is real and what is not and that we get these symbols of reality from our interactions with othe
The second theme of SI embraces two assumptions. The primary assumption states, "People and groups are influenced by cultural and social processes." (West & Turner, 2000, p. 79) This assumption recognizes the constraints that are set upon the individual due to social norms. These norms modify behavior in each person. I gain my meaning of how much time we should spend together from the norm of the society. This modifies my meanings that I have in my head to fit into society. I prefer to spend a small amount of time together for the purpose of building a relationship, but society varies on this idea. Therefore, I recognize this difference in my mind and either choose to modify my behavior or go against the societal norm. Culture plays into this concept in that how the U.S. culture views relationship may differ or work with the views of the African-American culture. The American culture may call for a large amount of time to be spent in a relationship while the African-American culture embraces independence, which limits this time. My boyfriend being African-American surrenders to the beliefs of our culture. The secondary assumption deals with these differences saying that, "social structure is worked out through social interaction." (West & Turner, 2000, p. 80) This assumption provides a solution for the previous assumption. It works on the belief of modification, that the structure can be modified freely in interactions. Therefore the African-American culture may embrace increased shared time if there is commitment in the relationship. rs. Ultimately the theory suggests that we modify these meanings in our mind and then act based on the symbols of reality that we have created. The opportunity for misunderstanding comes from the clashing of these meanings. In the proposed situation, Symbolic Interaction suggests that the problem lies in our individual meanings of the girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. The next theme in the Symbolic Interaction Theory is the Self. This theme concentrates on self-concept. Defined by West and Turner, self-concept is, "the relatively stable set of perceptions that people hold of themselves." The basic question is, "Who am I?" The answer to this question comes from our values, interests, talents, skills, limitations and many other areas. How we view ourselves affects every aspect of our daily lives. It is this notion that gives meaning and background to all that we do. The self is "the ability to reflect on ourselves from the perspective of others." (West & Turner, 2000, p. 81) In this concept we engage in what is called role taking, "the ability to symbolically place oneself in an imagined self of another person." (West & Turner, 2000, p. 81) According to Mead it is important that we be able to do this for development of the self. The particular role taking that Mead refers to is, the looking-glass self or, "our ability to see ourselves in the reflection of another's gaze" (West & Turner, 2000, p. 82). I look at my role as the girlfriend in the relationship through the eyes of others looking in on our relationship. This gives the perspective of another person from within. The struggle lies in the I and Me concepts. The I, is spontaneous, impulsive and creative. It is my inner self that is dying to emerge. The Me is socially aware and therefore k
Some common words found in the essay are:
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Approximate Word count = 2247
Approximate Pages = 9 (250 words per page double spaced)
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