The Effects of Divorce on Children
The effects of divorce on children might be likened to lighting striking a structure that is already compromised. The results can range anywhere to setting the entire building ablaze to merely putting a few cracks in the foundation. That more and more families are falling into crisis is evident by the demands placed on "help" lines and services which aid families. A Toronto-based "Kids Help" line reported that it receives over 4000 calls daily from stressed parents filled with "anger, resentment and despair" (Verburg, 1997). The Alberta College of Physicians and Surgeons reported a 70% increase in the use of Ritalin, a drug used to treat hyperactivity and inattentiveness in children, between 1991 and 1994 (Verburg, 1997). Mental health services have also experienced a dramatic rise in demand over recent years. Dr. Michael Ferri, a psychiatrist practicing in Grande Centre, Alberta, Canada, places much of the blame on the increasing divorce rate. "We need to guard against over-treatment for children victimized by divorce," (Ferri, 1998). "These children are dealing with the separation anxiety, which can lead to them thinking they've created the problem. They don't need psychotherapy; they need parents who understand t
Adolescents, filled with anger and resentment at the upheaval caused by divorce, may act out in other ways as well. Engaging in behavior that involves drugs and alcohol can be seen as a way of punishing their parents for the trauma divorce brings to the family. Other expressions of "punishing behavior" may include such things of disregarding curfews or rules, not making good grades in school or withdrawing from activities that the parents approve of, such as sports. In more extreme cases, antisocial behaviors such as shoplifting may emerge. Even parents who have ignored less provocative expressions of anger will be shaken out of their own situation and forced to pay attention to such displays of adolescent rage (Shapiro, 1996). However, not every adolescent who feels anger at divorce will express it such overt ways. Some, particularly teenagers who have low self-esteem, will turn to food as a means of alleviating the anxiety that are experiencing. By comforting themselves, they gain some measure of control in an uncertain world (Shapiro, 1996). Some adolescents adapt to the situation by developing a "false" maturity by assuming greater responsibility. They may become their parents' advisor and even confidant. Such a role is inappropriate for the child and can cause serious complications that ultimately hinder the adolescent's development (Shapiro, 1996). heir pain and have the tools to help them through it. Sending Johnny off to get fixed could even be internalized as punishment" (Verburg, 1997). Today, things are indeed different. Only two our of every five children in America live in the same household as their natural father (Blankenhorn, 1996). "Fatherlessness is the most destructive trend of our generation," (Blankenhorn, 1996). The absence of a father in the home has become a better predictor of criminal behavior then race or poverty (1996). With 46% of all families with children by single mothers who are living below the poverty line, it is easy to see why stress plays suc
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